my secret life story ! Am the one*

Maizatul nadirah .. theres something that you should know about me ..

You know that u are the perfect girl for me ? and you know that am loving you until now ? and yeah this is me .. the guy who loves you from the day he asked you to be his queen of his heart.

Am the one who love you from deep inside of his heart.

Am the one who will take a good care of you and makes you comfortable with me when am around and feels safe.

Am the one who always be there for you when u need me

Am the one who listen to you in every single thing .

Am the one who will sacrifice anything for you

Am the one who text every single morning and wish you good morning and good night even though am tired .

Am the one who always find time to spent time with his queen even though am busy .

Am the one who puts you my first priority than my own family .

Am the one hold you when you are crying and wipe away your tears

Am the one who thinks of you often throughout the day without the word boring

Am the one who cares about you more than anyone else because you are my # 1 shorty and my 1^st priority .

Am the one who thinks you are beautiful with no make-up on and just wearing only a plain shirt and normal jeans .

Am the one who listen to your stories without feel boring and keep your secrets like am your secret box.

Am the one who would not ever ever let anyone hurt you .

Am the one who always try not to hurt you even though sometimes I didn’t mean to .

Am the one who only drop my tears infront of you and when you wipe my tears .you feel my honestly

Am the one who would not ever pressure you to do something you don’t want to do

Am the one who calls you everyday to make sure you are alright .

Am the one who cant control the feeling of jealousy because am afraid and doesn’t want to lose you

Am the one who always tell you everything because you have the right to know about my secrets .

Am the one who always try to make jokes and try to make you laugh when you with me

Am the one who always tell that “ILOVEYOU” evey single day without feels boring saying that.

Am the one who will kiss you in your forehead and not expecting to kiss your lips because if I kiss your lips .. my heart will explode and it doesn’t always be in the mouth . ILOVEKISS you forehead J and yet kiss your lips . heee.

Am the one who always trying not to break my promises and hope that you trust me .

Am the one who will always be there when it comes the bad part and your down moment and I will always be faithful to you

Am the one who thinks that you’re the my only cure from the pain and my strength because u keeps me alive every single day .

Am the one who always turn excited when I see you and hang around with you.

Am the one who sometimes thinks its funny because if I mad at you.. and if you make one thing that I think its cute.. my ego will crush into pieces .

Am the one who always need you in my life and I don’t actually need anyone else to be around me because for me .. hanging around with you is the best part and always be my favv thing to do .

Am the one who would not ever find any girl accept you .

Am the one who not afraid to tell the whole world that am in love with you .

and and and

am the one who really really really want to make you the happiest girl in the world when you are with me .

but the end of the day .. am losing you to a jerk that doesn’t even appreciate you and not treating you like I did . someone who actually i didn’t trust to take a good care of you my princess .

my secret life ! From The Moment*

From the moment I looked into your eyes,

I saw stars sparkle

From the moment I kissed your lips,

Fireworks exploded

From the moment am in your embrace,
my heart is melting
From the moment you hold my hands,
I felt appreciated

From the moment you kissed my cheeks,
am flying with no wings
From the moment you said you love me
I believed it

BUT

From the moment you said you met someone,
my heart is crushing
From the moment you said you comfortable with him,
my heart exploded

From the moment you changed,
am dying inside
From the moment you walked away,
I wanted you to grab me from behind and hug me

From the moment you pulled my hands when I walked away,
I'm happy for a moment wishing you said all that was not true
From the moment you are with him,
I cried like a rain

&

From the moment you are happy out there,
am dying slowly everyday

my secret life ! promises*

16.10 p.m We promised that we're not going to be like this . We're not going to break up but but this you said to me before we left school .. please don't change after finish high school . please don't look and find and falling in love with someone out there. I need you in my life .. you're my everything and don't cheat on me because I cannot take that. I love love love love and forever I'll loving you and many promises that u promised to me . but who broke the promises ? who changed after we finish high school? am I ? am I falling in love with someone else? am I turned into someone that I'm not ? am I getting POPULAR ? am I getting HOT ? am I getting PLASTIC ? am I getting NEW LIFE ? AM I baby ? NO I AM NOT . but you are . you changed into someone that I don't even know . Where's my baby? where's my Maizatul Nadirah ? the girl that her attitude so comel .. manja .. childish .. matured .. independent .. think about future .. care about people around her and loves her family and friends and only her boyfriend .. where is she? and now .. you are not so comel anymore .. you are not matured anymore you are not Maizatul Nadirah that I knew . OH GOD . why you have to changed? is it cool ? is it nice? yeah for you , your new life now is happier than before . but until when? you forgot about us . your friends your family and me . did u ever call your friends? I guess you're not . because you have new friends out there at FOREVER 21 . I dont even know why I always thinking about you. maybe I miss the old Maizatul Nadirah maybe? I swear I love the Old MAIZATUL NADIRAH . the girl that watching movies with her friends NAD AND EZZA* watching korea's movie . the girl that hanging with her parents .. watching late night movie and stuff .. and the girl that used to called me sayang* baby* sweetheart* and always me me me ! but things changed like you said . and you grown up already . there's nothing much that I can do . accept accepting that you're gone . haih . but all the promises that we made ? I think its just a promises and a silly words.

my secret life ! When You're Gone*

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah

When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you

here it goes...my first secret ! WHY *

1.43 a.m . chatting and waiting for her to call me now . she used to called me and kacau kacau me when she cannot sleep . haha miss that little shorty lah ! but hey everything changed . yeah things changed. ALOT ! I have to accept that she is not going to call me and kacau kacau me lagi . :( and yesterday March 1st .. for no reason .. actually have reason. haha :p all by sudden .. my heart is missing that shorty . wondering what she is doing . is she ok out there? is she happy ? but i guess she is happy with her new world. and me? haha have to face all these shits alone and with pain in my heart . hahaha . ;( why why why i have to face it by myself? why im still thinking about her? I just want her to get out of my mind. pleaseee ! for once..but I can't . Its not easy and its hard. urghh. Maizatul Nadirah . Am missing youu . yes I do . why you have to be so meannnnnn?? WHY WHY WHY Nadirah. I love you . eventhough you hurting me this bad but im still in love with you . You are my number #1 girl in myheart . but the question is .. why I still feel that love ? why ? I dont want to love you anymore. You hurting me like HELL . Am bleeding inside . I dont have a mood to do anything . accept for thinking about you. URgh . I HATE YOU ! ;( ......... Sayangg...." I MISS YOU I LOVE YOU " ... can you tell me that u LOVE and MISS me? can you say it ? but i guess your not going to say because you are happy with someone else. :) am happy for you baby ! YES I DO ! .. babee... I want to tell you my secret that I used to tell you. AM HURTING AND HEARTBREAKING when I see your pictures . You made me cry when Im looking at those pictures of you..the pictures of you with that guy . because I used to be that guy that hold you and carry you . I used to be that guy that made u laugh and smile non-stop . but things changed.and am not that guy anymore. ;') but babe. if you are happy with your life now. Am happy for you (: .